Salik

Dubai's RTA (Roads & Transport Authority) has donated a new word to the English lexicon: Salik. It's Arabic for 'clear', English for 'illogical, unworkable, doomed to failure'.

Salik is the brand name given to the hugely unpopular Road Toll Scheme. It is due to start on 1st July (fortunately I'll be leaving a week later so I won't be affected by it unless my taxi to the Airport decides to use SZR). Motorists will be charged at only two points on Sheikh Zayed Road: Garhoud Bridge and Mall of the Emirates. Now, we all know that this is the busiest stretch of SZR, but you'll be able to enter and leave the road at any point between those mentioned and not pay a bean. The logic of this, well, it defies logic. Even more illogical is that it will cost every vehicle Dhs 4 to pass the charging points at any hour of the day or night.

There have already been public spats between Dubai police and the RTA about this, but the RTA are determined to go ahead with it. I wonder, will it be the RTA collecting fines from people who don't have the means to pay the toll? Or the Police?

Here's my prediction of what will happen.

Mid-June: Salik cards go on sale. Everyone who works for the RTA buys them. Nobody else does.

1 July: Salik is switched on. Massive fines are recorded for vehicles without Salik cards. Traffic increases on Jumeirah Road and Al Wasl Road, but it is not total gridlock because all the schools are on holiday and most drivers are away or not doing school runs.

September: schools re-open. Jumeirah Beach Road and Al Wasl Road and that road that goes from Port Rashid towards Garhoud are completely gridlocked. Some people have been stuck in their cars for three days.

Sheikh Mohammed instructs the RTA to shut down Salik. Suggests they call him back in a couple of years when the Metro is open, and RTA have figured out how to run a proper bus service.

Heads roll at the RTA.

Middle Finger Crime

The getting-worse-by-the-day Emirates Toady reports on the case of a British gentleman in court for allegedly flashing his middle finger at a local. I couldn't believe this story. Apparently this is the fifth 'middle-finger crime' incident to hit the courts in Dubai this year. People have been jailed and one was even deported for doing something that most people would not give a second thought to.

The Toady explains, for the benefit of us decency-challenged readers: 'Showing the middle finger - a Western gesture of insult and rejection - is considered tantamount to slander in the UAE.' Actually I did not know that. How can it be slander? Slander is a groundless or downright wrong verbal accusation made against someone. If what you said can be proved to be true, then no offence has been committed. In the case of middle-finger-waving, what are they presuming the finger-waver is saying? Something bad, no doubt. But what if it was justified by the actions of the other person? Sadly, the Emirates Toady report is lacking in detail: it states that the accused was asked whether he had any witnesses to support his claim that he was not waving his finger, but merely gesturing at his head to indicate to the other party that thinking about what he was doing would be a good idea. There is no mention of whether the 18-year-old local in his car with tinted windows had any witnesses.

Grrr...what a waste of time and money.

Also in today's Toady, Managing Editor Eudore R Chand makes a bid to take over where KT's Galadari left off. He's written a leader in which he claims that road tolls will make all our lives better. He seriously seems to think that the dhs 4 toll on part of Sheikh Zayed Road and the Garhoud Bridge will actually make a big difference to driving on these roads. Maybe it will, but it will be at the expense of total and utter gridlock on alternative routes like Al Wasl and Beach Roads, Emirates Road and the Maktoum Bridge and Shindagah Tunnel. For those who cannot or will not pay the toll, life will become even more of a nightmare than it already is.

Oops, that wasn't very positive was it? I hope the RTA will think again about this plan: Dubai needs serious alternative public transport infrastructure up and running before using tolls to drive people off the roads.